The Raydiant Labyrinth
"Love is Nothing"

"A farmer from Wilson County, James Baily Gardner was among those North Carolinians who would wear the confederate gray and he would be one of the lucky ones who came back alive and unharmed. He was a farmer, as his father before him, working a parcel of land his father had cleared in western Wilson County. Since 1853, James Bailey had been married to Peninah Batts, a planter’s daughter, whose American roots went back nearly two hundred years to the first Atlantic colonies. Their union would be blessed with seven offspring before Peninah’s untimely death in 1867. That same year Gardner claimed a new bride, the teenage Mary Dilda, twenty-two years his junior. With her his issue would grow by another half-dozen: Cynthia, Benjamin, Charles, Warren, and in 1878, Jonas Bailey, and two years after that their last, a daughter named Ava Virginia.

James Bailey Gardner was a disagreeable man, prone to black moods, drunkenness, and violence, increasingly so as the years went on. He was a chronic imbiber of moonshine, and when his black moods and his corn liquor converged he was a menace to all. At those times it was the designated job of the youngest child, Ava Virginia, to run into the house and find the old man’s gun and hide it. Gardner and his second family lived on the farm his wife had inherited from her father…” p. 13-14 Ava Gardner by Lee Server.

Patriarchy, the enforced transmission of trauma tainted sperm to haunt generations, simultaneously enforcing trauma through reproduction while literally breeding women to death for the sake of their own proclivities to create more beings subject to their trauma whilst already being predisposed genetically by their sperm trauma transmission to either accept or become it. Reproduction enforced through abusiveness to enforce the male ability/proclivity to engage in reproduction by force for their evolutionary advantage to maximize it, perpetuated generationally. 

"And you wonder why we don’t like you."

http://www.nature.com/news/fearful-memories-haunt-mouse-descendants-1.14272

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/sperm-rna-carries-marks-of-trauma/

Bullfinch’s Mythology – Orpheus and Eurydice

Orpheus was the son of Apollo and the Muse Calliope. He was presented by his father with a lyre and taught to play upon it, which he did to such perfection that nothing could withstand the charm of his music. Not only his fellow-mortals, but wild beasts were softened by his strains, and gathering round him laid by their fierceness, and stood entranced with his lay. Nay, the very trees and rocks were sensible to the charm. The former crowded round him and the latter relaxed somewhat of their hardness, softened by his notes.

Hymen had been called to bless with his presence the nuptials of Orpheus with Eurydice; but though he attended, he brought no happy omens with him. His very torch smoked and brought tears into their eyes. In coincidence with such prognostics, Eurydice, shortly after her marriage, while wandering with the nymphs her companions, was seen by the shepherd Aristaeus, who was struck by her beauty and made advances to her. She fled, and in flying trod upon a snake in the grass, was bitten in the foot, and died. Orpheus sang his grief to all who breathed the upper air, both gods and men, and finding it all unavailing resolved to seek his wife in the regions of the dead (Hades). He descended by a cave situated on the side of the promontory of Taenarus and arrived at the Stygian realm. He passed through crowds of ghosts and presented himself before the throne of Pluto and Proserpine. Accompanying the words with the lyre, he sang:

"O deities of the under-world, to whom all we who live must come, hear my words, for they are true. I come not to spy out the secrets of Tartarus, nor to try my strength against the three-headed dog with snaky hair who guards the entrance. I come to seek my wife, whose opening years the poisonous viper’s fang has brought to an untimely end. Love has led me here, Love, a god all powerful with us who dwell on the earth, and, if old traditions say true, not less so here. I implore you by these abodes full of terror, these realms of silence and uncreated things, unite again the thread of Eurydice’s life. We all are destined to you, and sooner or later must pass to your domain. She too, when she shall have filled her term of life, will rightly be yours. But till then grant her to me, I beseech you. If you deny me, I cannot return alone; you shall triumph in the death of us both."

As he sang these tender strains, the very ghosts shed tears. Tantalus, in spite of his thirst, stopped for a moment his efforts for water, Ixion’s wheel stood still, the vulture ceased to tear the giant’s liver, the daughters of Danaus rested from their task of drawing water in a sieve, and Sisyphus sat on his rock to listen. Then for the first time, it is said, the cheeks of the Furies were wet with tears. Proserpine could not resist, and Pluto himself gave way. Eurydice was called. She came from among the new-arrived ghosts, limping with her wounded foot. Orpheus was permitted to take her away with him on one condition, that he should not turn around to look at her till they should have reached the upper air. Under this condition they proceeded on their way, he leading, she following, through passages dark and steep, in total silence, till they had nearly reached the outlet into the cheerful upper world, when Orpheus, in a moment of forgetfulness, to assure himself that she was still following, cast a glance behind him, when instantly she was borne away. Stretching out their arms to embrace each other, they grasped only the air! Dying now a second time, she yet cannot reproach her husband, for how can she blame his impatience to behold her? “Farewell,” she said, “a last farewell,”- and was hurried away, so fast that the sound hardly reached his ears.

Orpheus endeavored to follow her, and besought permission to return and try once more for her release; but the stern ferryman (Charon) repulsed him and refused passage. Seven days he lingered about the brink, without food or sleep; then bitterly accusing of cruelty the powers of Erebus, he sang his complaints to the rocks and mountains, melting the hearts of tigers and moving the oaks from their stations. (Basically after that it loses relevance.)

He held himself aloof from womankind, dwelling constantly on the recollection of his sad mischance. The Thracian maidens tried their best to captivate him, but he repulsed their advances. They bore with him as long as they could; but finding him insensible one day, excited by the rites of Bacchus, one of them exclaimed, “See yonder our despiser!” and threw at him her javelin. The weapon, as soon as it came within the sound of his lyre, fell harmless at his feet. So did also the stones that they threw at him.

But the women raised a scream and drowned the voice of the music, and then the missiles reached him and soon were stained with his blood. The maniacs tore him limb from limb, and threw his head and his lyre into the river Hebrus, down which they floated, murmuring sad music, to which the shores responded a plaintive symphony. The Muses gathered up the fragments of his body and buried them at Libethra, where the nightingale is said to sing over his grave more sweetly than in any other part of Greece. His lyre was placed by Jupiter among the stars (constellation of Lyra). His shade passed a second time to Tartarus where he sought out his Eurydice and embraced her with eager arms. They roam the happy fields together now, sometimes he leading, sometimes she; and Orpheus gazes as much as he will upon her, no longer incurring a penalty for a thoughtless glance.

"The Archives" Redux

She” (10/88)

wall to wall i hear the noise
standard in her voice
simple in her choice


i’m the one she swore she’d never love
i’m the one i know she’s thinking of

Jennifer Ever” (late 1988)-played for the first time since 1989 in 2013

she always waits for someone
someone, someone just like me

Daughter” (1989)

Honey Spider (1989) live
 
Bye June (1989)
 
Bye June
I’m going to the moon
It better be by June
‘Cause I’m going to the moon

So June
You’d better make it soon
I hope you make it June
‘Cause I’m going to the moon
Bye June

Bye June
I’m going to the moon
I hope you make it soon
‘Cause I’m waiting on this moon

Bye June
I hope you make it too
I’m wishing you’re there too
I hope you make it June

Bye bye June
Hope you make it to the moon
 
Bury Me” (1989 12/90-03/91)
 
bury me in love
bury me in love

shared your kisses
shame your heart
buried me and it hurts

i love my sister so [chain, unchain]
she don’t smother me [chain, unchain, unchain]
i played the spades i know [unchain]
i’m a jack of all trades
would you bury me

want to see her born inside [hide, hide]
some of the things you just can’t hide
if you see her tell me why [hide, hide]
why won’t she come outside


she waits, bury me
she waits, bury me
 
Jackie-Blue” (Summer 1990) –and there he had the room concept nailed way before (and far better) than anyone else, when it had begun, and had identified her as “blue” to boot.
 
Ooh-hoo, Jackie Blue
Lives a life from inside of her room
Hides a smile when she’s wearing a frown
Ooh, Jackie, your not so down

You like your life in a free form style
You’ll take it in and spread your love a mile
There never seems to be quite enough
Loving around us when your loving comes

Ooh-hoo, Jackie Blue
What’s a game, ooh, that you never lose
Ask a winner and you’ll probably find
Ooh, Jackie they lost you some time
– guess who had.

Don’t try tell me that you’re not aware
Of what you’re doing and that you don’t care
You say that it’s easy, just a natural thing
Like playing music that you’ve never seen

Ooh-hoo, Jackie Blue
Making wishes that never come true
Going places where you’ve never been
Ooh, Jackie, you’ve blown it again
 
I Am One (12/90-03/91) live
Revisited with a new version in 2008, and again in 2011.
 
Siva (12/90-03/91)
 
Way down deep within my heart
Lies a soul that’s torn apart
Tell me, tell me what you’re after
I just want to get there faster
 
Crush (12/90-03/91)
love comes in colors i can’t deny –same as Bono’s treatment in “Spanish Eyes” and “Luminous Times”
Resumed live in 2008.
 
Suffer (12/90-03/91)
all that you suffer is all that you are
all that you smother is all that you are
and you’re seeing, you’re seeing
you’re seeing who you are
what takes meaning is cleaning
the meaning of who you are

on this scene
i will dream
on this scene

all of your struggles beneath your disguise
drink from the reasons that hold you alive
to ascend from the words of desire and pain
you must rise from the mounds of desire and change

too late to discover peace of mind
too late to recover me

all you see and all you breathe and
all you cease to be
take him down your only son and
what he means to me
your dream will be
to dream with me

will you wait, yes i’ll wait
i will wait for you
will you wait, yes i’ll wait
i will wait for you
to cleanse your life
takes more than time
take what you want
take all of me
 
Suffer was incorporated into “The March Hare” in 2008 having not been performed since 1993.
 
Terrapin
 
Snail (12/90-03/91) live
 
The lyrics she encountered were different for this song and would have had a different influence:
 
All yoursevendreams
Look close, son, and
you’llbelieve
As
yourthings come undone
Seeyou are the only one

Flower seize the hour I did
I
wait
Waitingwaiting for yourwake
I’llwait

Whenyouwake up you’re all weak
Throwingyour life away
Someday, sorrycoming home
Sorrysnail
Whatyouwait for

Flower, the pain willwashaway, away
When the sunshines
Climbsthroughyourwindowintoyourbed
 
Tristessa (12/90-03/91) what you believe you’ll wish to receive”, Window Paine (12/90-03/91), DayDream (1989, 12/90-03/91) liveRevived live in 2007-08.
 
my daydream seems as one inside of you
though it seems hard to reach through this life
your blue and hopeless life
 
La Dolly Vita (1990, 12/90-03/91, Pisces Iscariot)
 
even with all her visions
you can’t even stop
can’t see what you’re missing
spinning like a top

fade away i want to see her
fade away i want to see her
i only want to meet her

la dolly vita
true as blue sky
la dolly vita
cool as ice cream
cool as ice cream

take it all the way down
forsake what you have now
take it all the way down
 
Starla (12/90-03/91 Pisces Iscariot)
 
to disappear takes so much time
starla dear, you’re on my mind
 
i’m in here
please take me home
starla dear, i’m all alone
when you can’t decide what’s on our mind, it’s clear
i’m here
starla dear

serve yourself
no one else can do for you like you
no one else fails like me
in my eyes i burn alive
fly like a bird
no more words just you and i
high in the sky
 
This was the version of the lyrics she found; it was very significant that it was understood that “she” was going to disappear and that it would take a lot of time, and that she couldn’t decide what was on “our” mind, not a singular pronoun but plural, inferring a collective, and that resolution in this context he declared as implicit in recognition of him, his presence. It had the exact same effect in the singular.
 
Blue (12/90-03/91) – the term Blue was replete with use now and had always been one of her favourites; this was written when the envelope was being opened by Bono creatively, when he was creating what would become the net, the way “they” found out, starting with him. This pre-awareness struck her on a very deep level; it seemed he knew of her before (and by the “right” colour).
 
Slunk (12/90-03/91) “every house is now your home” –she noted that this was after the mental expansion she’d done with “The Lost Chapter” and that Bono had sung something very similar in the same year, when he’d embraced “her”. 

How does it feel
When you meet her in your home
How does it feel
When you feel her, let it go

Bono, Bootleg outtakes, ‘90, “Blow your House Down”. In other words at the moment “she” expanded into someone’s context of home, Billy acknowledged it at the same time.
 
Drown” (03/92)
 
No matter where you are
I can still hear you when you drown
You’ve traveled very far
Just to see if I’d come around
When I’m down
All of those yesterdays
Coming around

No matter where you are
I can still hear you when you dream (on some versions, “scream”)
You traveled very far
You traveled far, like a star
And you are
All of those yesterdays
Coming around

Is it something someone said?
Was it something someone said?

Yesterday the sky was you
And I still feel the same
Nothing left for me to do
And I still feel the same

I wish, I wish I could fly
I wish, I wish I could lie
I will, I will try
I will, I will
Goodbye
 
Frail and Bedazzled”(Fall 1992, 12/92-03/93)
 
Again this was an instance where she had a different version of the lyrics: what struck her was “Two of us, that’s dangerous, it’s all inside our heads”. He’s saying it’s all inside “your” head now

Pissant” (Fall 1992, 12/92-03/93 Pisces Iscariot)

inside your head
trust me instead
inside your head

Hummer(Fall 1992, 12/92-03/93 Siamese Dream)
Ask yourself a question
Anyone but me
I ain’t free

Do you feel
Love is real?

Soma”(Fall 1992, 12/92-03/93) –the nature of “Pisces Iscariot”. She never referred to it. 

Set the Ray to Jerry”- lyrics (12/02-03/93) –For her the title had her name and saying set the Ray to Jerry was the same as setting her to a guy, which was exactly what the song set out to do, being Billy himself speaking in the 1st person. This song had hardly been performed before 2007.
 
Born to please every simple need
I stand alone in my thoughts indeed
Hate you
For ever making me
I’m in you, I’m your anything

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you

Come to me, let me hold you still
I’m so tired, just as tired as you
Take me for anyone but me
All that you feel is never true

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you

When you say that you are
Forever my star
Could never let you go, no, no
And never let you know

Let roar these fears
To the whore of my tears
Pure as a lie, I pour to your eyes
Suck you like the sap from a tree
Honey from the dew, from the bumblebees, yeah yeah

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you

When you say that you are
Forever my star
Could never let you go, no, no
Never let you know

And I- want you
And I- need you
And all you are is brand new
And I- need you
 
Girl Named Sandoz (10/04/94, Pisces Iscariot) – definitely on the same drugs. Done much earlier than the release date would suggest but unknown exactly.
 
Hello Kitty Kat” (Fall 1992 12/93-03/93)
 
but i aim to please the little girl inside of me too
 
Mayonaise(Fall 1992 12/93-03/93)
 
pick your pockets full of sorrow
run away with me tomorrow
June
 
we’ll try and ease the pain
but somehow we’ll feel the same
well, no one knows
where our secrets go
 
Geek USA”(Siamese Dream 07/27/93, Fall 1992)
 
If by chance
Or circumstance
We should fail
Don’t be so sad

Shot full of diamonds
and a million years
The disappointed disappear
Like they were never here

In a dream
We are connected
Siamese twins
At the wrist

And then I knew we’d been forsaken
Expelled from paradise
I can’t believe them
When they say that it’s alright
 
She really loves to break
Her dad says it’s OK
She really loves to break
And give it all away

Her ma says she’s afraid
What more can she fake
She really needs to break
And give herself away

She gave it all away
She gave it all away
She gave it all away
 
Even when she’d first seen Siamese Dream she was struck by this and how it seemed, even if quite loosely, to delineate the stress she felt from her triangle with her parents, and how her father had sanctioned it whereas her mother had initially questioned.
 
Luna (Siamese Dream 07/27/93) lyrics (12/92-03/93)
 
And those moonsongs
That you sing your babies
Will be the songs to see you through

I’ll hear your song
 
This was the sort of thing she’d have readily dismissed, and did. But when she saw it all together, it took on another dimension completely, as it was bound to do after it was indeed her “moonsong” that had seen her though, via the same commitment to “sing along” happening in so many others all at once.

Wishing You Were (Fall 1994 -lyrics are there) “Wishing you were mine, a thing that’s already divine

Silverfuck (12/92-03/93)
And she was my lover so sweet
And she was my angel
And what I’ve recovered of me
I put into a box underneath my bed

Medellia of the Gray Skies (Mellon Collie B-Sides Box Set 1995) lyrics
You’re the gods’ forces struck down somewhere
She had a rational explanation for being “the emptiness of love”, because she had generated past herself, far removed and far away; where she was, she was alone. First and only live performance, 2008.
 
Cherry” (Mellon Collie B-Sides, Fall 1994)
Rose was a term Bono had used for “her” in no less than four separate places (including “stony rose”); it would recur many times elsewhere. Years later she learned it was the Gemini flower, as well as Gemini being represented by the Pearl (which had also come up). When this was composed it was true that she had lost all her petals; she was shattering in a way where she thought she’d be lost forever.
 
Stay with me, I’ll set you free
‘Cause I can tell you once were pretty
Rose so sad you’ve lost your petals
Lost the lustre off your tattle tales

All the boys have been left for dead
‘Cause we go where they fear to tread
The beautiful one’s the one’s we’ll remember
The precious one’s our greatest pretenders

I need a love to help me find my way
I need a strength that I cannot betray
I need a word to say what I can’t say
I need a lover, lover
I need a lover, lover

And if you lose yourself
Could you take me, too?
Could you rest inside the sleep?

Stay with me, I’ll set you free from you…

Believe (James Iha, 03-08/95)
 
Close your eyes
Until the sunlight dies
In your head a thousand stars
Through the darkness you can see a light
And if they steal your life
Your heart is still mine

I want to believe in you and I heard you
Your song, you sing, a truth, there’s no other
I want to believe in you, dear

On Sunday…
 
For her “In your head a thousand stars” was a metaphor that was literal. Again composed when she considered herself to have lost her life in some indefinable sense, the song could not have been a greater comfort to find.
 
Mouths of Babes” (03-08/95), a Mellon Collie B-side
-Developed during the breaking when she went under.
 
the “dream” was a sham
for saving what you can’t
and now they’re me but i’m not them
i am you and you are me

it’s in the ways i walk thru fire
it’s in the ways of my desire
and when i said that you’re no good
what i meant was i wish you could

be there forever
be young forever
i wish you were there

so now i bid farewell
beyond the bounds of hell
and now you’ll swear you knew us well
well you can never tell
 
Here Is No Why (Fall 1994, 03-08/95)
During this period she was struck by it; she wondered if this had to do with Cave (after all, he had literally been dubbed The King of Goth, Doom as well). It reflected on how he had been completely beyond what she was willing to absorb at that time, the gulf of rebellion. And if that had remained true, she would have indeed been trapped forever in her “sad machines”. 

To Forgive” (Fall 1994 – 08/95)

Ten times removed,
I forget about where it all began
The bastard son of a bastard son
Of a wild-eyed child of the sun
 
It was in this period she realized exactly why he’d put a generation in the lineage. He claimed to inherit directly from the first “bastard son” that her father would have rejected outright if he knew, -Bono; the new definition she’d found/created of the “marriage”, in an exclusive way. He’d put it in without knowing what it signified. And in that context, he was unrequited.
 
Rotten Apples (Fall 1994, 03-08/95)
 
Dirty your face
With longing and grace, God-given
Suffer her heart
And love her when your love goes unrequited

Where the cool winds blow
I must surely go
For my love calls me below to drag her
from the depths of my soul


When will I see her again?
The other side of friends
The darkened claws of death
The empty breath desire
 
This was before she even knew he existed in terms of herself. It also captured where he “found” her, only through an interior spiritual connection. That the meeting would take place after the “death” process she’d undergone once she was on the other side, and in what context that would be, was obvious.
 
Jupiter’s Lament” (Fall 1994, 03-08/95)
 
Gone, long gone
Leave this world of wrong, wrong, wrong
Beyond the pale, beyond the dawn
Flee these mortal bonds

No one knows I can’t be wrong
So I’ll sing the same old song
I tried to be strong
For you

Why have you left me?
Amongst the tall trees
I know I gave her all I have

And I tied her heart in ribbons
Tied her heart in ribbons
Tied her heart in ribbons
And bows
 
First it caught the place she had really been lost in the time period it happened, which was “in the woods”. It reminded her of Cave’s Lovely Creature”, a song where he’d also described losing “her” in 1996, but this had the correct place it had actually happened, same as Tori Amos’ “January”.
 
The Aeroplane Flies High (03/96, 1994) lyrics
 
love is a sentimental heart
life is a sentimental way
spy the fragile heart so cursed
as he walks across this earth
i’m disconnected by your smile
disconnect a million miles
and what you promised me
i hope will set you free
i’m disconnected by your smile
and all i gave to you is lost
and all you took from me is lost
black wings carry me so high
up to meet you in the sky

wishing you were real to me
wishing i could make believe
i’ll take my secrets to the grave
safely held beneath the waves
always knew i couldn’t save
always knew i couldn’t save you
 
Does this bear repetition? It was after “she” was lost to him. The facet of insight was that he’d always known he couldn’t save her when she disconnected, much the same as Bono’s “I’m yourself in someone else, don’t find yourself in me, I can’t lift you up again”. And reciprocally, it was lost. This song was revived to the set in 2007.

Space Jam” (Live during the MCIS Tour and 01/02/97)

Well yes anything dual-edge “Daddy” that was either a) revelatory or b) definitely something else was bound to freak her right out. Especially in terms of its being, or being confined to a secret.

where you been
it’s been such a long time
where you been
it’s been such a long time
where you been
it’s been such a long time


Cross” (Adore Demo)

Climb a cross
A sea-filled cross

Climb above
The still water


Desperate to
Seek to way
Earn your chance
With golden harvest


Find my hand pressing in
Meant no feeling in
Just the distance calling
It’s distance calling
It’s distance calling

There is no wanting
There’s no way across
There is no wanting and can’t go on
In a world you’d understand
This is your moment
In a world of being
Shoulda been dead, left for dead
This distance calling
This distance calling
This distance calling


If she’d ever encountered that, it would more than blown her mind. And this Adore demo was interesting too; “Because You Are” (poster has lyrics).

The Last Song (03/96)
 
this is the last song
this is the last song i’ll sing for you

this is the last song
this is the last song i can give you
 
and no one comes for free
in this place where the angels sleep
this is the last song
my eyes are open wonder to this
as you hold the secrets
i count the minutes off so perfectly
the shards of broken glass
sing the strains of a sad old tune
we’ve made it at last
but what we had is lost inside our past
this is the last song
could you find a way across me
to forgive and forget me
to appease and relent me
to deceive and detect me
to understand and release me
to the dawn
this is the last song
 
Transformer (03/96) –had its major majority of performances live in 2008.
 
This one just blew her mind; the concept behind transformer was the essence of everything it all meant.
 
a livewire moves slow
a transformer always knows
the score is four
leaves you hanging on the floor
for more and less and more of the blame
and she’s tired
and she’s sick of the same old shit
it’s just more of the same old same
i know she wants more and more and more to witness
to lay down and bear true

knows just what she wants to do
with you below the silver skies
don’t hate her because she’s undecided

i know she wants more and more and more to stomach
in honour of her youth
she’s not sorry she’s happy
sorry she’s happy
she’s not sorry she’s happy
sorry she’s happy as a turtle
she’s a real live transformer
 
“[T]he score is four” she heard when she had no clue what it meant, but in this self-same season it would come to mean something for the first time; April 22nd would be the day she would conceive the idea of presenting four proofs, with the sense that they were all she would have to meet Bono with. The blame was in the vein of “Bang & Blame”, how the severance generated a sense of blame. (Why else would you do that to somebody, right?)
 
The combination of the two couplets “more and more and more” connected the lyrics of both so that what she wanted them to bear witness to was what she had isolated and developed in her youth, for them to bear witness inside the collective consciousness.
 
In terms of knowing “just what she wants to do”, it was true at this point in time that she was conflicted and still undecided, which is what the song berates her for being slow about and being content in being slow, because what satisfies her is being “a real live transformer”.  It just made her laugh, because at this point she’d put her brain on full stop by submersing it in college; the transformer was in a dead stall.
 
Eye (Summer 1996) –she knew it wasn’t enough. Again, when she went under:
 
Is it any wonder I can’t sleep?
All I have is all you gave to me
Is it any wonder I found peace through you?
Took to the gates of heaven, to myself be damned
Turn away from light


Her rejoinder of the event she felt it captured? (“The Archives” would be delivered to Billy six times over.) “It was like kissing the gates and getting shut down forever.” Brought back live in 2008.
 
Blissed and Gone” (02/97, 11/97-03/98)
 
and if you’re still feeling down
then maybe you need me around
to love and hold you
don’t say i hadn’t told you so
maybe you need me around
 
Also previously unknown to her were B-sides from Adore:
 
Czarina” (11/97-03/98)
 
i need no reason for the first time in my life
i just need to be on my way
i don’t want for anything that i don’t have
all i want is waiting for me there, for me there
with my czarina, queen of all that i believe
stillborn seasons cradle our affairs

i light a candle
my lover to protect
in sackcloth and ashes
my lover will descend
 
Once in a While” (02/97, 11/97-03/98 Machina II)
 
She fatally read that it said “I will take the new ring”, not “refrain”, which to her, having just discovered that Bono may have believed he was entering an abstract marriage commanded by God somewhat simultaneous to her own entry, would take on a very serious dimension, because that was where she viewed the new ring as having come from.
 
For “Blank Page” she noticed that “stop signtold me stayat home,
told me youwere not alone” had been written during the period that Cave happened to be writing The Boatman’s Call.
 
Summer” (James Iha 11/97-03/98)
 
Let Me Give the World to You” (03/98, 11/97-03/98, Machina II)
 
last chance to make believe in always and all it seems
train wrecks hide underneath your umbrella
set the frame destiny on this first name soliloquy
 
new skin may hold you in
but the old skin still turns us on
 
let me give the world to you my love
let me show you what i’m thinking of
times are hard and we’re the last in line
‘cause in my grief i’d forgotten what was mine
 
no i wouldn’t change a thing
no i, no
no i wouldn’t change a thing about the way you are
the distance here, speak so far
so far
so far
so far
 
 
Definition: so·lil·o·quy Noun  /səˈliləkwē/
  1. An act of speaking one’s thoughts aloud when by oneself or regardless of any hearers, esp. by a character in a play.
 
Incidentally the line as she had read it was “Set the frail destiny on a first name soliloquy” –a little different. In her mind the “new skin” was the one she’d developed independently in conceiving the universality. The “old skin” was the religious foundation. The distance here, speak so far implied a spiritual connectivity taking place in a removed way over thousands of miles.
"Blow Your House Down" -U2 out take
Wake up…Better wake up dead man
Better find a new plan
Better wake up dead man


You got to give so
Get by on the booze
Say all you gotta know
Get rocked, and baby
Disco in a hall
It’s a generation come back
Now that you got it


You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
Better find a new plan
Better wake up dead man


You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
Gotta find a new plan
Better wake up dead man

Wake up, wake up, wake up
She’s got soul
She’s blurry in the eyes
Got which days baby
Cut you to the eyes
Get sick with the hip
Get the right slip
If you want to, here she comes
Here she comes


Better wake up
Better wake up dead man

Better find a new plan
Better wake up dead man

What does it feel like when you heart it’s full of soul
You kicking it farther, you dunk your body low
Why does it feel like you should know
The lights in the clouds and in your eyes
Round, round, round


You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
Better find a new plan
Better wake up dead man


You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
Better find a new plan

Better wake up dead man

Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up
Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up
Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up
Sugar, Sugar, Sugar

You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
Better find a new plan
Better wake up dead man


You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
Better find a new plan
Better wake up dead man
You better wake up
Wake up dead man
It’s in the new plan
This is my baby, so why don’t you leave me

Check it out, check it out, check it out

You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
Gotta find a new plan
Better wake up dead man
You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
'Cause there's something in your hand
Better wake up dead man
You better wake up
Better wake up dead man
We took a new plan
Better wake up dead man
guyfarris:

YES

guyfarris:

YES

roverpaul:

@
guess who’s up

guess who’s up